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Dealing with problems with coworkers

by Snehal Tanwar
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Bad relationships and ongoing problems with coworkers can make the work environment unpleasant and end up turning what seemed to be a good job into a source of stress, discomfort and desire to quit, as well as negatively impacting your labor performance.

If you find yourself in a situation like this, possibly the only thing you want is to find a way to solve it and be able to do your job with peace of mind, but you may not be entirely clear on how to do it.

Important things to keep in mind

First of all, there are a few things to keep in mind about conflicts between coworkers and troubled people.

    1. Most of the time, troubled people don’t know they are, and may even be truly surprised to hear their peers’ opinion of them, as Professor Mitchell Kusy of Antioch University, who interviewed 500, showed in a study. managers.
    2. Also keep in mind that what you interpret about that person’s behavior may not be entirely true. Maybe you think that he intends to hurt you on purpose, when what happens is that person feels threatened or has felt attacked by you. That is to say, their opinion on what is happening between you may be very different from yours, as well as their point of view and their interpretation of what happened and may even punish that you are the root of the problem.
    3. Sometimes it is the personal problems themselves that lead a person to misbehave with others, due to their low self-esteem , feeling of incompetence, lack of capacity, insecurities, fears, etc. For this reason, it can be of great help to know that person and understand their psychology as much as you can, because that will help you in your relationship.
  1. At other times, people are so different from each other that they collide at the slightest interaction. For example, you may feel bad that someone talks to you in bad ways, but if you ask that person why they talk to you like that or yell at you, they might be totally surprised because it turns out to be their usual way of expressing themselves.

Taking all of these things into account will help you have more flexible and realistic thinking .

What can you do

    • Talk to that person — The first thing you should do is put the cards on the table and talk openly with that person about what’s going on. Try to speak privately and calmly explain the problem, ask him if he has a problem with you and ask him to explain what it is, trying to know his point of view, his interpretations of what happened, if he is hurt by something, etc.
      Although this seems the most logical answer, many people do not say anything of what they are feeling, but limit themselves “giving it back” to the other person indirectly and underhandedly, with comments or criticism behind them, pouting and similar behaviors . With this you only manage to make the situation worse.
    • Take care of your self-esteem — When you meet someone with whom you have problems and cannot solve them, your self-esteem may be affected. That is to say, you feel frustration at not being able to solve the conflict once and for all, and those negative emotions can make you think less clearly and see everything blacker. So be careful with this and don’t criticize or mistreat yourself for what’s going on. Try to adopt a problem-solving attitude.
  • Think about whether you are contributing in any way to creating the problems or aggravating them —analyze your own behavior with that person, think about whether you have done or said something that may have bothered them, ask yourself if you are having aggressive-passive behavior; that is, if you are taking revenge on that person slyly, indirectly interfering with his work or criticizing him behind his back.
  • Don’t take everything personally – It doesn’t have to be personal against you. The other person may think that all they do is defend their work, or defend themselves against you, or even think that there is no problem.
  • Be professional — When you face the problem, try to adopt a professional and mature attitude. Behave in a polite, sincere, and frank manner. Try to keep your emotions under control, do not respond impulsively or get carried away by emotional outbursts. Focus on improving your relationship and resolving differences in order to work in peace.

Article by: Themes Mob

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